Invest Your Time: Discovering the ROI of Children

By: Payton M. Ishmael


Time daily becomes an increasingly more valuable resource. It's not uncommon to hear, “there just aren't enough hours in a day” or other expressions about a lack or shortage of time. I'm beginning to think that there must be a solution; a solvent to this worldwide epidemic and I believe it begins with our perspective on the clock's continuous tick.

Most of us wake up and spend the entire day hustling around trying to get a multitude of tasks accomplished. Have you ever realized that ALL of our tasks are urgent. As we rush from point A to point B going about our business – we forget about being about our Father's business. We allow our own schedules to blind us from the divine appointments placed in our paths. How will this wretched lifestyle ever change? How can we make this unending circle of chaos evolve into a lifestyle where worship is placed before works? I believe it begins with our children. It's easy to pass by someone who comes to your knees or even your waistline, but it's even easier for these short hearts to look up to us... and they all look up to someone.I had the opportunity a while back to see my cousin's son, Trenton, who was four at the time. “Payntninn (that's how he says my name), where's that scrapbook?” He asks with an alarmed look on his face. Several months ago, Trenton had created a beautiful arrangement of Sponge Bob, Mickey Mouse and smiley face stickers in a small, pocket-sized scrapbook. I was the lucky family member who he insisted keep the scrapbook.

As I explained to him that it was at home, he was delighted to know that I knew just what he was talking about. Then he went on and on about his next scrapbook he wanted to make. Children will talk to anyone who will listen. What an incredible way to spend our time and reverse the chaotic cycle of time we currently travel.At the end of the day, when our to-do lists are complete and finally get off our feet, what have we really done? What has truly been accomplished? Let's attempt to quit throwing time away by putting it into 'urgent matters' that really aren't so crucial and instead make an investment with our time... starting first with our children. The investment we make into this young and growing generation is one that will yield great profits, I feel certain. Thank you to the precious hearts and innocent minds who unknowingly bless our souls.

Written in 2007 for Freedom Force newsletter

Easier Said Than Done: Learning to Forgive

By: Payton M. Ishmael

“I hate you!” I still remember the day I spoke the piercing words to my mother. It was just another day that I didn’t get my way. Combined with all the pain she’d caused me, I believed my words were true. Our relationship was one tainted by drugs, neglect and lies among a host of other hurts.

Bitterness, jealousy, and hate found their resting place within me as a preteen. What I assumed was revenge on my mother and guarding myself from going through anymore of her deceit, turned out to be a spiritual disease of the heart. It affected my thought process and infected every relationship in my life.

I guess it was when I moved to Oklahoma that I was finally able to shut her out of my life enough that she could no longer let me down or disappoint me anymore. I just didn’t care. In place of all the feelings I once held towards her, was now a great void called ‘unforgiveness.’

“Create in me a clean heart, oh God,” I cried out in desperation from the chaotic mess my life was in. That’s when issues, some I never even knew I had, began to surface. Among the many was the unforgiveness that jaded my heart.

You see, as long as we hold onto these detrimental grudges, that section of our life is incapable of being filled with something the Lord wants to give us. It took me laying down my guard and my pride, but I expressed to my mother how I’d felt for so many years. I gave her a glimpse of the scars she caused on my heart. It was then that I began to see I was guilty of reciprocating hurt to her, only in much different ways. I avoided her when she was diagnosed with cancer. I refused to inform her of anything taking place in my life. I showed blatant disrespect to the very person who birthed me into this world.

I went to my mother seeking an apology so that I could rid myself of the unforgiveness. (Col 3:14) Instead, the healing began only as I confessed my wrong-doings. I’ve placed so much blame on her imperfections as a mother that I’ve overlooked my failures a daughter.

I’m not perfect. My mother is not perfect, and guess what else... you're not perfect either. If any of us were, there would be no need for forgiveness. We get hurt and we hurt others, whether intentional or unaware. So what do we do? We forgive. There's an amazing healing power that comes through the act of forgiveness.

Don't let unforgiveness become the captor of your heart. Forgive, forgive, and forgive some more. (Matt 18:21-22) The rewards and replacements of unforgiveness are immeasurable. Let it go and let he Lord refill you with something a new.

Written for House of Prayer newsletter: April 4, 2010

Be Still & Know: Sometimes We Progress the Most When We're Not Moving at All

By: Payton M. Ishmael
Panic. Despair. Confusion. Seeking answers. Longing for guidance. Begging for direction. Bowed before the King, impatiently looking to Him for the next step. “Now what, God? Where do you want me to go? What do you want me to say? Who do you want me to be? Which do you want me to choose? When do you want me to proceed? Why me? Why this?”
I’ve spent the last couple of months rekindle a relationship of intimacy with my King; Learning to let go of things that don’t matter, and instead fixing my attention on things with eternal value. The paragraph above paints a picture of my previous prayer life. I was an emotional basket case who feared the unknown and spent every moment of prayer seeking, “what’s next?”
Then something began to stir within me. My prayers ceased coming from my mind just as yellow ‘under construction’ tape wrapped itself around my heart. Now, as the Lord works on my heart, he has given my soul peace. I simply want to bask in His presence. I don’t need to know what’s going to happen tomorrow. I still want the Lord’s guidance and I wish it was easier for me to listen and heed his direction. However, knowing the ‘next step’ is no longer the primary meditation of my heart.
Psalm 46:10 says “Be still, and know that I am God.” Wow! What a joy to take delight in simply knowing that God is in control. It doesn’t matter what the next minute of the day brings. For so long, my prayer has been a one way street. I talk and talk and talk and talk. Rarely do I take the time to listen, and never have I made a habit of enjoying being in His presence.
One of my closest girlfriends and I joke that we know we know we’ve become great friends because we can sit outsides, each reading books; never talking but spending time together nonetheless. Now that I simply spend the time to ‘be still and know…’ I’ve seen more progress in my relationship with Christ than I ever did when it was one-way communication. “Prayer requires more of the heart than the tongue.” –Adam Clarke

Love, Schmove: When the Going Gets Tough, Get Tougher

By: Payton M. Ishmael
Okay, okay, okay! I admit it. As the elusive Saint Valentine’s Day began to sneak up on us, I cringed at the sight of Cupid (a half naked cherub), rose (which die in less than a week), and chocolate (I don’t even like chocolate). What’s the point? And for the anti-Valentine, what in the good Heavens can I write about in the paper to enlighten a church full of loving people? That’s when ‘KISS’ popped into my mind. Now we’re talking. The acronym stands for “Keep It Simple, Silly.” With simplicity in mind, I flipped over to the chapter of Love; I Cor. 13 with every intention to write a cliché article on how to love. After reading the chapter over 3 times, I changed my mind.
“Baby girl, you’re going to have to toughen up a little,” Poppy still tells me. Guess what church! Being a Christian does not make life on this Earth easy. It doesn’t exempt you from being hurt by the words and actions of the people around you. In fact, with the whole arrangement about how we’re supposed to lay down our pride and be humble… we might even be more susceptible to having our feelings hurt. So what do you do? You toughen up! Flex your muscles, grit your teeth, and face the issue head on. Now, that might work for some of you, but meet me after church and ask me to flex… for comedic relief.
I hear people say “you can mess with me, but don’t mess with my kids!” I don’t have kids, so I’m going to stick with “you can mess with me, but don’t mess with my baby brother.” It’s all the same, I can get frustrated with my loved ones, but don’t you dare.
We can’t fight our own battles every single tie. We must hold the Master’s hand and trust in His provisions and His guidance. Additionally, we must look out for our own. I Cor. 13 says ‘love protects’. I can recall many a time when my family came to my rescue. Poppy even had words with one of my former coaches. When we love people, we have a natural instinct to protect them from all harm. See, love doesn’t have to be all sappy after all.

Written February 14, 2010 for House of Prayer newsletter Vol. 1 Issue 5

All My Heart's Desires: Sometimes the 'Wanter' Simply Won't Break

By: Payton M. Ishmael

“I wish someone would break your ‘wanter’,” my grandparents have told me since infancy. I’m not sure if it’s true, but they tease that my first word was ‘maw-mart’ which is Paytonese for “Wal-Mart.” Just like you, there are things that I wish for. I feel certain that I could fill this entire newsletter with my current wish list; books for my Kindle, a sports car, a new Burberry bag and maybe some Chanel shoes would be first in line. For these things, and those similar, our wisest game plan is to cut frivolous spending and save, save, save.
There are different types of wants, however, that can’t be written on a list nor purchased from a store. Instead these longings fulfill the desires of hearts. Although they do not trump our basic needs for survival like air, food and water they nonetheless provide fulfillment to our lives. These ‘desires’ bring about long-term joy while those afore mentioned ‘wants’ bring only temporary satisfaction.
When I was young, I could nag relentlessly I hopes of attaining my latest ‘want.’ I see this with kids today too. After the initial ‘no’ there’s at least 10 minutes of pleased and often deal-making. I’m amazed at the long list of chores kids will commit to in order to get their way. Please remind me when I have children to hold out as long as I can… free house keeping.
Our hearts’ wishes, though, don’t work this way. No amount of begging, pleading, nagging, or promise making will provide the things our souls long for. The cure for loneliness can’t be purchased. The mending for a broken heart can’t be granted by our favorite aunt. The direction for a lofty goal can’t be achieved through even the most Godly pastor. Guidance through the tangled webs we weave doesn’t come from mommy, daddy, sister nor husband. In fact, it’s much easier than that. “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4
I urge you to hear me out even if you don’t ever listen to me again. When you allow the Lord to take residence in your heart, everything else falls perfectly and divinely into place.

Written February , 2010 for House of Prayer newsletter Vol. 1 Issue 4

Prayer Changes Things: A Time-Old Cliche That Still Rings True Today

By: Payton M. Ishmael

Hanging in my kitchen is a sign that reads, “Prayer Changes Things.” It seems like an obvious response to that time-old saying is simply, “Well, duh!” If you operate the way I do, however, many things in life are easier said than done.
It seems the world is always searching; searching for acceptance, searching for love, searching for fortune. Others search aimlessly, not quite certain of what they’re looking for but positive that something is missing and longing to be fulfilled with the unknown ‘missing piece’.
I have self-diagnosed obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). I thrive on planning, structure, and routine. As a teenager, I had life figured out completely. I knew exactly what I was going to do with my life and worked with great determination to make it happen. I like to be in control, I think I inherited that from your lovely pastor’s wife. Fortunately, my control over my life and my perfectly thought-out plans turned in to a heap of trouble and a mess far too big for me to clean up. “Where can I go but to the Lord?”
I’ve always believe d in the power of prayer, but when times get tough and life gets hard, why does it take being at my wits end before I get on my knees?
I’m truly amazed by God. I stand in awe at His willingness to listen to us. When I need something, I have people that I confide in… Poppy, Anna, and my dad are excellent to listen to me and to provide guidance but there’s a delay in communication even today’s modern world. There’s always the risk of human error I their advice. How truly blessed are we that our Father knows our prayers before we even speak them? How incredibly fortunate are we to serve a gracious God who puts us in the right spot at the perfect time?
We approach the throne of grace clad indifferent life experiences. Some of us are filled with bitterness, hate, or jealous. Many of us seek repair for broken hearts or divine healing. Don’t let your troubled spirit be weary my brothers and sisters, prayer changes things. Don’t expect to leave the altar unchanged.

Written January 31, 2010 for House of Prayer newsletter Vol. 1 Issue 3

Don't Act Your Age: Approaching Life With Child-Like Faith

By: Payton M. Ishmael

They say that I can move the mountains
And send them falling to the sea
They say that I can walk on water
If I would follow and believe with Faith Like a Child
– Jars of Clay

Who knew that life lessons could be learned from a week’s worth of adventures with a 2 and 6-year-old! Particularly enlightening were the conquered feats of the wobbling 2-year old. In celebration of his 2nd birthday, his father bought him a battery-operated 4-wheeler that clearly stated, “Not for children under 3.” To my surprise, however, he drove the machine like a professional. Someone forgot to tell him he wasn’t old enough to be capable to drive that 4-wheeler.
All good things must come to an end. Unfortunately for the kiddos, this includes play-time. As both children pouted their way inside the house, the 4-wheeler was subsequently parked in the hall way. The 2-year old wasn’t taking ‘no’ for an answer, as most of you have probably experienced before. Instead, he proceeded to push the 4-wheeler up and down the hall. Someone forgot to tell him he wasn’t strong enough to move a 4-wheeler.
There are many instances where a person has achieved great things after being told they weren’t fast enough, smart enough, strong enough, or capable. You’ve already heard the multitude of celebrities, among the ranks of Michael Jordan. These people are the exception, not the rule. I can only imagine the triumphs if “I can’t” and “you can’t” were non-existent. Since, instead, they are a part of our daily speech, we have to choose to ignore this language of defeat and choose to have faith like a child.
Having child-like faith isn’t only beneficial, it’s necessary. “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of Heaven.” Matt. 18:3 We are capable of so much more than we expect of ourselves and far more than what others think. Forget the limitations and boundaries that have been placed around your potential. Instead, approach like a child believing that “with God, all things are possible.” Matt. 19:26
Reconstruct your thought process. Think more like the 2-year-old conquering feats of a 3 year old on a 4-wheeler. “Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of Heaven.” Matt: 18:4 Strive for greatness. Have faith like that of a brave, 2-year-old conqueror.

Written March 20, 2010 for House of Prayer newsletter Vol. 1 Issue 10